I LOVE TO HATE COZ I HATE TO LOVE!!!
the time i found out he is going back to Manila, i was thankful that my circumstances were way past going back to him. In a matter of 3 to 4 days, I snapped back to reality that my supposed reason that I'll be avoiding my ex-friction was and still is not mine, and oh! was never mine! (damn shit!)
so, what?!? i dont know now. for the past year, not in my nearest being did i think of seeing him. the former...hehe! things are not the way they were. i think he is such a jerk, and that is why i dont want to see him, to talk to him, to feel his presence.
there are a couple of reasons why im beginning to be shit scared and hostile to see him....
1) he's my past, a ghost!
2) he's a jerk to others but generally, jerness status wouldn't be lifted.
3) because i believe i am vulnerable to loving again... after my misconceived love affair, hell am I vulnerable to love!
then i heard our song, ooh! it gives me the creeps yeah!
then again i think it is a sign?!?
answer: I HOPE NOT!!!!!
I love to hate him coz i really hate to love him.
I'd rather hate him, than to fall and be wrong again.